Two meetings today with Large Corporation that Laid Me Off: one was the first step in a job I applied for via our company intranet. I have NO idea what the job is for. Honestly. The job descriptions are so vague and useless, it’s far better to just apply and go to the interview THEN decide how you feel.
The second meeting was simply a “hey, I know you’re out of a job, I’ll keep an eye out for you” kind of thing.
Then I came home and for the last two hours, save the 8 minutes I used to make tea, have been trying to apply for jobs with General Electric and Proctor & Gamble. Let’s break it all down here.
The GE job sounds AWESOME – right up my alley. I keep asking people if they know someone at GE because I really hate applying online. I feel it takes my resume out of my control and garbles my personal branding and messaging. However, I can’t find anyone at GE to pass my name to so I am relegated to tossing my e-hat into the e-ring and hoping for an e-mail requesting an interview. The application online with GE took about 45 minutes. The good thing about their process is that they allow you to add a cover letter as well as other materials which was perfect since some of the work I do can really only be described in visuals.
I checked out P&G because it’s a big ol company and I thought they’d have lots of jobs and so forth. But their online application process is arduous, to say the least. Make an account. Upload your resume. Upload your cover letter. Take our tests. They’re half an hour each. TAKE THEM or we WON’T EVEN LOOK AT YOUR SILLY RESUME! I took the first one and it was questions like, “How influential are you?” and several along the lines of, “How do you feel about stealing from the company?”
WHY are you asking me this? You don’t even know if you want to hire me!
So it took me 2 hours to apply to 2 jobs.